Dead......

What does it mean to die? Has it hit u that death could be more than a just u lyk dying. U could die on the inside n still b alive, u could lose the person in u. The thing is dying on the inside is ur empty, ur souls missing u lack ur very essence u lose purpose n direction. U become broken, n when u die on the inside u can never fully recover, u lose a part of u or a whole sector of u. If u lose everything u r at ur most fragile, d ppl around u n what u go through at that point will decide what u gonna become. Who d new u wil b, what ur persona's gonna b bout. Dying on the inside is a steady breakdown of ur soul, n d happy around u ain't enof to help u fix it. To die on the inside means u think a lot n when u get to that point ur ability to deal with things is gone ur crashin n falling n the worst thing is u go through this alone. The worst kinda this is when u can't identify the problem, when u knw smthn or a whole lotta things r wrong but u can't do nothing bout it. D only help u can get is sme1 who survived this n found out where the problem came from, but the thing is u can't truly b helped cuz evey1s got a different problem. Similar in some ways but different, no 1 truly knws how to fix it 4 u. All them books they charge 4 that can fix u n stuff is fake, if u survive smthn lyk this trust me u gonna do it 4 free. What it is, u cnt xplain what's going on to ppl n eventually the quiet dsnt help anymore so all u wanna do is b by urself doing ur thing. It ain't nice being on ur own n most ppl can't just shit up n giv u a hug, that helps with a hug that not only lasts long bit allows u to b at peace with urself. Those can make u cry because at that moment there is the realization that things r never gonna b d same but u hav ppl there to support u in mute is comforting cuz going through this alone is not nyc. But survival is a must so u gotta pick a purpose that is good n noble enof n hope one day that leads u to a good direction.